Thursday, April 30, 2009

Checking in

Well what energy I thought I had, is gone, was gone. Whatever. I went to see Marsha to work out this afternoon and even though we agreed to take it easier than usual because I've been sick, it was exhausting. It really wore me out. I'm sure it will come back over the next so many days, but it certainly is not today :)

Anyway, I just wanted to post like I said I would. Off to bed for me.

Back at the office today

Feeling better today. Woke up before the alarm so I guess I'm rested. There is much to do today that is backed up, but progress will be made. Back on my vitamins today so things are back to normal. I'll post again later today.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Worked from home today

Yesterday I was so ill... I caught what Julie had over the weekend. I did not go in today for fear of spreading what I'll call the stomach flu. I'll leave the details of my symptoms there. At any rate, spent basically 24 hours in bed and it has done me very well. I have energy now, which I've not had for some days. I still have not materially eaten as I have not been interested, but food is sounding good to me again. Julie was great at keeping me in chicken broth and Performance so I'm not really dehydrated. I did not take any vitamins yesterday but did get a B in me so far today. Will get another here in a bit, but won't make three today. I'll be back on schedule tomorrow.

Monday, April 27, 2009

I wish I would've listened

I am still not back up to speed. Yesterday was good in that I got to take a nap for an hour or so and went to bed early. I was thinking about what the PT had said about energy conservation and I did not do that at all. I had it and blew it all at once. Well I certainly know not to do that again. I have had a few offers already to help with the yard work and luckily it does not need it yet (yea Bermuda grass!).

Our new employee should start next Monday so that will be a big help at the office. We had the pool table picked up on Friday so that is out of the way, making the space available again for desks. We have some cable runs to do before that but we have all week. We also got a used A/C unit for the server room and are figuring out how to get it vented and such so hopefully we will save some $ on cooling too in the next month or so.

Not much else to say right now, feel like going to sleep. Off to bed again early tonight I hope as well.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Still not back

I'm still very tired today. We went to a birthday party (a friend's son) and after that, came home and fixed the fence gate. While that was not a lot of work, it was very difficult energy-wise. It was hard to even walk back and forth to put away the tools and roll up the extension cord. I've eaten dinner by now but am still not recovered. Hopefully an early bedtime will make things better for tomorrow.

Friday, April 24, 2009

About last night

Well I have been exhausted today. I definitely overdid it yesterday. My leg has been very heavy today and it seems like everything is difficult. Just standing up out of a chair takes thought before I do it. It has been a very frustrating day in that sense.

Tonight has been more of the same in addition to the normal daily spiral I've experienced for some time. So I'll head to bed early and see what tomorrow brings.

Last night

Last night was an interesting experience for Julie and me. I went to my training as usual with Marsha, did all of that, and when I got home I still was interested in doing chores. I wanted to fix the gate on our fence that is half-broken, put things back into the attic!

So we went to Home Depot (we prefer Lowe's but we had a gift card to use) and got a male hose end replacement (the one on a hose we had was bent up), a new gate lock, and a ceiling fan (for our bedroom, the old one was orig equip and was noisy and the light fixture was ugly).

We then went to Phyllis' house and got the Dish network stuff they wanted returned and then went home and fixed the hose and put up the ceiling fan. Julie and I both were very surprised at how long I was interested in doing stuff rather than crashing on the couch. It was a very interesting evening.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Closer to calling it

Julie and I were talking at length last night about how much more energy I have and how my symptoms appear to be less severe. I want to qualify that because my symptoms are not going away, but I think my additional energy is making them less noticeable.

We both commented how just a couple of months ago we were getting worried about my abilities this summer on a number of fronts. I usually am able to mow the flat portion of the yard (friends help with the hill so I don't fall and have the mower cut my feet off) and walk around Silver Dollar City, play some on the trampoline, etc. There were a number of evenings, really becoming the norm rather than the exception, that I just didn't have the energy to do anything. I didn't want to work out or play and it was obvious that the heaviness in my leg was really getting in the way by the end of the day.

Last night we were discussing how much different I am reacting, especially this last week or so. I have a noticeably larger energy reserve than just weeks ago. I have come home form work with enough energy to be interested in going to the gym and play with the kids. Even after going to the gym and having the obvious decrease in function of my leg because it was fatigued, my body in general has not been so much. I can still have a decent conversation and am willing to not be fully relegated to the couch / floor. I am waking easier than I can ever remember, even when Julie and I stay up late talking (which we have a habit of doing), last night being a good example. We finally got to bed about 12:45 because we were both awake and talking / watching TV. My alarm went of at 6:30 this morning, and while I hit 'snooze' a few times, I am used to actually falling asleep, but did not this morning (nor have I for the last few days after the first buzz goes off).

All in all, I think the mB12 is giving me more energy. The real question that I need to talk with Dr. M about now is (and we have to monitor things I know) whether I maintain this dosage schedule or change, are there other internal side effects I don't know about (blood work and stuff will tell us that), and is this simply a very interesting placebo effect? All to be seen in the future, but certainly interesting results to be sure so far.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Oh yeah

Please comment! I'd like to know who is lurking around and seeing how I'm doing.

Sorry for the delay

Long time in between posts I know. I feel like I need to have something to say though and even though I've been told numerous times that I talk a lot, it seems when I am typing here, I lock up. Perhaps it is the intimidation that my words can be judged forever :P

I worked an absolute ton yesterday. By 4:00 I had a VPN that simply would not come back online and so I drove to OKC to get it working. I did get admin access to it again (as even that was broken) and then left the rest of the work to this morning. I went and saw Julie's grandmother for a bit (got fed and had good conversation, can you ask for more?). I got home about 11:00 last night.

Today has been pretty good so far. I didn't wear my ankle brace overnight, nor today and things are not hurting. I think I'll wear it again just at night for the next few just to be on the safe side.

Marsha gave me a new incentive to lose weight / pants size. She said if I can pull my goal off by June 15th she'll give me a free massage and so I have renewed vigor for exercise; I've been 5 days in a row and would have gone last night but for the OKC trip. I will be returning tonight to the gym.

The mB12 is still a regular habit. I will be scheduling a visit with Dr. M regarding the use and some other metabolic differences I've noticed but I won't go into them until I talk with him (nothing serious). I need a CBC and some other blood tests to make sure my body is not freaking out with it.

My next interviewee is here so I need to go now, but I'll try to post again tonight.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Wow I'm tired.

I barely slept last night. My ankle really hurts.

Longer story. About two weeks ago (I'm not sure when) we had a snowstorm for a day. We went outside and had a great time in the snow but somehow I got hurt. The next day my ankle started hurting really bad. It is an intermittent, very stabbing pain in the 10 o'clock position of the joint if you were looking down through your leg onto the floor, if that helps. There are tendons and whatnot around that area so I have a 70% confidence it is a soft-tissue injury and not broken.

So I have this brace (AXIS) from the time years go I tore up my right ankle and have put it on and off for the last two weeks. Obviously only enough to get over my immediate need and then taking it off and letting it get re-irritated.

At any rate, it really got bad last night. It woke me up at 4:15 and even though I put the brace back on, I did not really sleep after that. Rest yes, sleep no. If I ever actually went to sleep and moved at all, I got stabbed awake in the ankle again.

So, I'm worthless today. :(

Friday, April 10, 2009

The weekend is almost here.

It is Friday. Good Friday in fact. So Happy Passover and Easter!

I feel like I have a lot to say today somewhere hidden, so I'm going to work on this post off and on through the day. If it seems to ramble, so be it.

The mB12 has been taken without fail since I got my instructions for 3x / day. I really do think it is helping my energy levels, but I want to clarify some things as I've been thinking about them.

Tired: For me tired is / was a continual issue. I only rarely feel 'awake and refreshed'. That has long since gone, or at least any material time period of that feeling has. It is probably most obvious in the morning right after a shower but it is transient at best.

Fatigue: For me that happens periodically when my body is screaming 'no more'. This usually occurs after exercise or yard work. My ability to walk becomes greatly impaired and I end up holding on to things just to keep from falling over / down. Fatigue is only a temporary thing most of the time as it will pass in 30 minutes to an hour. Then I'm just tired again. I may be able to get up and go again, but that fatigue crossover will come more quickly than the first time.

All in all, I just want to be clear when I talk about energy levels, for me it is about how close to fatigue I feel. I'll say that for the sake of discussion, feeling a 10 is the most energy I can ever remember having. A 3 would be fatigue onset, and 1 would be an inability to move from the place you fell. I think I start at 6 or 7 most days, and hit a 3 at least once a day. I have long since described my symptoms as a sliding window, where my decline in ability is relatively standard throughout the day as I spend what energy I have. The difference in how I feel at the end of the day depends on how I felt when I woke up. 7->3, 6->2, etc. or at least that is the general idea.

What I've noticed since taking the mB12 is that I have more 7 starts, if I can call it that. I certainly do feel so tightly bound to the coffe cup in the monrings like I used to.

A good example of fatigue is what happened when Julie and I were cleaning out the garage. After a while I got to where I couldn't hardly stand or walk. It is VERY frustrating. She is very understanding, but I don't like feeling my symptoms so obviously. I suppose that is the worst part of this for me. It isn't the day-to-day symptoms that bother me so much as I can laugh about losing my balance into a door jamb or whatever. It is when I really want to do something and simply can't. Anyway, I sat down on the porch for 15 minutes and got enough back to pull the cars back inside, but I was worthless the rest of the day. It also happens sometimes when I am working out, although it is not a good thing to do so we try to avoid that as best we can. Marsha has a pretty good eye for when I'm wearing out, but it can come on very quickly, even in just a few reps, depending on what we are doing and how much my left leg gets pushed.

On another note, work is going well. The guy we hired a couple of weeks ago quit. That was a bummer, but he said he thought he was more cut out for a 'single network' support job and I get that. I've always thought that what I do (we do) is not for every IT person. We have interviewed 3 or 4 people but none have made it back to Russell and me to do the technical interviews just yet. Keep praying for the right person!

Monday, April 6, 2009


The MS Walk was great! Thank you so much to all of my supporters. It was a grueling walk. 3 miles is a lot longer then what I had thought it was. The last 1/2 mile was very difficult, but I made it. I was thinking that this would be similar to walking around Silver Dollar City, and it was, but all at once!

I have been taking my mB12 3 times a day since I was told to. Again, I have been waking easier and have had a bit more energy through the day, but I am still not ready to directly relate it to the B12 yet. After a month, if my opinion remains, I'll talk to Dr. M. and see what he thinks about going off of the mB12 to contrast my experience(s).

We lost a dear friend (Phyllis) this last week and are taking care of her things this week. We will all miss her.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Getting Closer

To MS Walk 2009!

This past weekend it actually snowed here in Tulsa. Wet, heavy snow. It was fun as we all got outside an threw snowballs and built a snowman that melted the next day. I twisted my ankle and have been nursing it for the last few days. Hopefully it will be back to 100% for the walk. It is 80% there now, only hurting if I get it just 'so-so'.

I have little to discuss about the B12, although I do seem to have more energy as I look back over the last few days. My overall fatigue seems to be lower. Even though I am still tired at the end of the work day, I am not quite as 'exhausted' as I remember being. I have also awoken a little easier over the last couple of days. While sleep and rest can all be attributed to different things, I'm going to keep a close watch to see if bedtime, alarm, etc. are relatively consistent to see if it is the B12 or me being more diligent to 'go to bed'.